Last week a buddy of mine and i decided he would spend the weekend in Midland. He came down from Amarillo. Friday night a couple of my Brother Knights come over to the house. They had a kitchen pass from mama and were gonna use it. We drank a lot of beer and was grilling Jalapena Poppers, Muenster Sausage and burgers.
About 2200 we decided to go downtown to the two bars in Midland. We discussed the logistics of us drunken clams driving to the bar. Samantha decided she would be designated driver for myself, Mardy, Carlos and Rohmie the Homie.
We go to The Bar, and it was crowded. We stayed for maybe 30 minutes and cruised over to Hot Shots. Here it wasn't so crowded and they had a decent band. We are slamming Rum and beer and playing pool. Rohmie the Homie is in a chair with wheels on it so we go hauling ass around the dance floor. A good time was had by all until we heard the dreaded word "Last Call"
We close the tab and Samantha is fighting to get all of us back in the truck. Some want to ride in the back and some can't walk straight to the truck. She is a good baby sitter.
Rohmie the Homie decided he wanted to be dropped off at his place and then Samantha decided she was going to cook us breakfast. We was ready for some of that. We go back to their house, right next door to me, crack open a few beers and Samantha is making here Egg, Potatoe, Sausage and jalepena combination. The smell was a bit strong but due to my alcoholic haze it didn't raise a flag.
She set the plate in front of me and we dug in. I see Carlos fighting for breath and running for a bottle of water. About that time the full heat of those peppers hit me and i couldn't breath. 3 bites into this meal and i am soaking toast in beer to prevent blister formation in my mouth. I thought i was going to die. I drank about 1/2 gallon of water trying to put that fire out.
My eyes were watering, my tongue was hanging out, Carlos was wimpering 'I want to go home" and Mardy was fighting through the heat. I was gagging and i headed for the door. I limped back home and made an ice pack to suck on. It burnt the enamel off my teeth. When i hit the bed, my head was spinning and i welcomed death.
The next morning i awoke and was scared to fart. I farted once and caught my drawers on fire. I was dreading what i knew was coming. I thought the peppers burned through my stomach and was eating my spine. Carlos and myself wouldn't get no further than 20 feet form the shitter. We couldn't trust a fart. It was bad.
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1 comment:
ROFLMAO! I'll be praying for you, Ray. I just can't party with the big dogs anymore.
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