11 February 2009

The mother of all test

It is upon us. The mother of all test for those not married, Valentines day. So many men will make a fatal mistake with this holiday. I wish them well. We are a brotherhood and must stick together. You don't believe me, go to Walgreens Friday night and see how many last minute shoppers are there fighting over the last Valentine card. It is Pathetic.

What do you get your fiance? I thought about lingerie but what does that imply? I give you this so you can make me happy? I don't think that will fly.

She doesn't like chocolate so that is out. I thought about buying her a small pistol but that might imply i bought the gift more for me.

I guess i got lucky because she has to work Saturday. That means i will only see her for about an hour before she goes to work that night. Hopefully i can manage an hour without saying something stupid and getting myself in the doghouse on Valentines day.

I asked her what she would like and she told me whatever i got would be good. How is that for a setup for failure? She wants to see if i step on my dick i think. I've decide to go big or go home. I will rock this holiday or crash and burn. No time for mediocrity here. An impression must be made. I will formulate a plan of attack and stick to it. I will prevail.

I was going to have roses delivered to the hospital but she told me she didn't like that idea. This is going to require me to think outside of the box. I think i have a plan, what do you think?

She has to work Friday, Saturday and Sunday night. I was going to go into her house Friday night while she is at work. I am thinking about hiding her gift, a pearl bracelet, and then leaving post it notes strategically located in the house to lead her to it.

I will prevail.

1 comment:

Jon said...

Make her a big pot of gumbo. Don't forget the potato salad.