The neighbor, a dog and a .45

The other day my neighbor and good friend told me they were going to New Orleans on vacation. His wife is from Louisiana and they are a good source of ingredients when they go home. They asked me to watch the house and to feed the dogs. Now my neighbor and I are both Oilfield Trash so our schedules are not exactly chiseled in stone. As we are used too, he also asked another friend to help feed the dogs. He figured between the two of us, one of us would get the dogs fed.

One thing i failed to mention that was that both dogs are Pit Bulls. The smallest one goes about 80 pounds. She is also the mother of the bigger male, appropriately named "Monster".

With us being friends, i have been around both of these animals since they were pups. When the mother was a pup she used to come over to the house and play with some of my pups, Pugs to be exact. It was funny to watch them play. Actually they still play together to this day. They are really friends.

So i come home from Borger TX and grab the key and walk over to the neighbors to check on the dogs. I am letting the dogs run around and i am sitting in neighbors house watching TV with the front door open. I want people to know that somebody is home. I go to the kitchen to grab a beer, they said i could, and when i walk into the living room there stand Other Friend looking at me. He says " Is that the last beer?"
"No" I say, then he looks and says " Whats in your pants?" I reply in typical oilfield fashion " My Dick, would you like to sniff it?"
He replies " Not the front of your pants Ken Doll, the back of your pants" "Oh that i say" and i pull out a Beretta Cougar .40 cal.

Now other friend was like " What the hell is that for?"

I look at him with the most stupid look i could muster and say " Are you kidding?"

So we talk about the killer instinct instilled into pit bulls and we end up playing PS3 while watching the dogs. Now i have known these dogs since they were pups, but i will not go into their house without the owners there unless i am armed. The dogs know me, but you never know if one of them is having a bad day. It is better to have a piece and not need it, than to need it and not have it.