16 October 2009
Homer was in the fertilized egg business.> He had several hundred hens called "pullets,"> and 10 roosters to fertilize the eggs. He kept> records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup> pot and was replaced.>> This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny> bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a> different tone, so he could tell from a distance which> rooster was performing. Now he could sit on the porch> and fill out an efficiency report by just listening to the> bells.>> Homer's favorite rooster, old Butch, was a> very fine specimen, but one morning he noticed old> Butch's bell hadn't rung at all! When he went to> investigate, he saw the other roosters were busy chasing> pullets, bells-a-ringing, but the pullets, hearing the> roosters coming, would run for cover.>>> To Homer's amazement, old Butch had> his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He> would sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the> next one. Homer was so proud of old Butch, he entered> him in the County Fair and Butch became an overnight> sensation among the judges.>> The> judges not only awarded old Butch the “No-Bell Piece> Prize”, but they also awarded him the “Pulletsurprise”> as well.>> Clearly old Butch was a Democrat in the> making. Who else but a Democrat could figure out how> to win two of the most highly coveted awards on the planet> by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and> screwing them when they weren't paying> attention.