26 November 2008

Memories and Beer

Tomorrow will be the first Thanksgiving without my wife. If today is an indication of what it will be like, i wish it was already over. Last year my parents where here for Thanksgiving and it snowed 4 inches. That was the first time i think my parents saw snow like that. It was an awesome Thanksgiving.

This year i will be alone for Thanksgiving. Being alone doesn't bother me. Its the fact that the one person whom my life revolved around is no longer with me. I don't know what to do with our old traditions so my plan is to do nothing. For 4 years in the Navy we learned how to be alone on the holidays. When your stationed overseas Thanksgiving isn't celebrated. You just deal with it.

My girlfriend will be working tomorrow so i have the day to myself. Her family gathered for Thanksgiving last Sunday. I got to meet most of her family. Everything went fine as planned. Me and her Dad get along just fine other than the fact that he is a former Marine and i a former Sailor. We jabbed at each other a bit and had fun with it.

I must admit that in the last 12 years, Thanksgiving at GF's families place was a lot more civilized than i am used to. You see my in-laws are a rough sort. Hell, damn near all of them had spent a little time as guest of the local law enforcement's public hotel. They didn't consider it a good gathering unless the cops were called. When i was at GF's gathering i was constantly on guard for a sucker punch or something. Old habits die hard LOL. Not that the in-laws gathering weren't fun, we had a blast, they just weren't normal i guess. They were simply what happened when a bunch of rednecks get together with a lot of booze and free time. I must say that i was at home with them. Since Ruth's Dad passed in December 2007 and Ruth passed in January 2008, her family has fractured and gone their separate ways. They will not be getting together for any holidays. There is some bad blood between them now.

A side not to the above paragraph. One Thanksgiving a couple of years back, we hosted it. Everybody came over and as usual the beer was flowing, the food was good and the shit was being talked. Everybody was having a good time until Brother-in-law decided that his step-daughter's, cousin's husband, wasn't treating her right. Sounds kinda trailer parkish i know, but it is the truth. Anywho, words were shared and a fight broke out. After we pulled them apart, Brother-in-law had a huge piece of the dudes ear in his mouth. That guy was bleeding like a stuck pig. I couldn't stop laughing. It was so "Mike Tyson" it cracked me up. I think i still have that hunk of ear in a zip lock bag somewhere.

Now you have a glimpse of what i am used to, and it all stopped overnight. As i move forward and try to untangle my thoughts and traditions, i look to the future and wonder what the future holds for me. I am a chameleon in the sense that i easily adapt. Hopefully i can establish new traditions with the GF and we have a future together.

GF is a really good person. She knows that i still love Ruth and always will. She can accept that and allows me my time when i need it. I couldn't ask for a nicer person to be with and she understands my demons. I only hope that i can live up to the be the person she thinks i am.

Happy Thanksgiving and may your holidays be blessed.


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